That Should Be Me
by CrimsonWater35
Summary: Here's a songfic inspired by the song That Should be me  PLease read my Story :   One shot. R and R :


**Hey everyone this a song-fic inspired one-shot by the song that should be me.  
>I kinda picked this song cause I know that sometimes everyone encounters this kind of feeling or problem right? <strong>****

**NORMAL POV**

It was a chilly afternoon for it was already november and a certain brunette with hazel orbs about 5"4' age:16. Was in her room listening to her Ipod in the verge of crying for the song that played hit a spot. For it was a song, No, scratch that. _"The" _song that describes her life, to be more specific her love life.

MIKAN's POV

It was very chilly today and I decided to stay at home, mope around and simply listen to music. I listened to various song ranging from: Beyonce to Taylor Swift.

_Everybody's laughing in my mind  
>Rumors spreadin' 'bout this other guy<em>

When I heard those few stanza's I immediately knew what song it was. It was a song that described my life, to be more specific, My love life. That song was a song that when I hear brings back all the pain I felt _"he" _inflicted to my heart. That song. That dreadful song that shatters my heart everytime is That should be me.

_Everybody's laughing in my mind  
>Rumors spreadin' 'bout this other guy<em>

_~Flashback~_

_It was a Monday that day and Mikan Sakura our lovely brunett who was still at that time 15 years old. Just arrived inside the classroom early. To some it was a shock since she always did come late. _

_But for those who knew what day it was in Mikan's calendar that is it is. Natsume and her's 6 th monthsary or their 6__th__ month as an official couple._

_Mikan went inside the classroom with a big smile plastered on her face. But boy was that smile going to be thrown out the window. If only she knew. She wouldn't have came early._

_" HOTARU!" Mikan said as she ran to a genius of a bestfriend, And attempted to hug her.  
>"BAKA BAKA BAKA" before she could even get close she was hit by the almighty baka gun.<br>That's why I said attempted._

_" Hotaru meanie" Mikan wailed at her bestfriend while crying waterfalls.  
>"Mikan, I have to show you something." Hotaru said seriously and the seriousness in her voice made Mikan nervous. But decided to shrug the feeling of since maybe Hotaru would just like to show her stolen pictures of Natsume and or Ruka. The Infamous Boyfriend of her bestfriend Ice queen/ black mailing queen, Imai Hotaru._

_But oh how she was wrong._

_" Mikan now listen to me, After you see this tape let me explain on how, where and when I got this and who are the people in it okay?" Hotaru asked her calmly but sternly. Then Hotaru dragged Mikan on to her scooter and into her lab. When they got there._

_Hotaru then started to role a clip._

_The place the clip is seen is in a bench at a park in Central Park.  
>Where there it reaveled two figures making out. And by the looks on how they were making out. It was pretty intense.<em>

_The girl which was more visible. It was night by then, Even though there were lights in that park they were dim. Even with the dim lights you could see that the girl had.  
>Blonde hair. But due to the dim light, You can't really recognize who the blond was.<br>"What is the point of the video if I don't know who these two people are" Mikan thought_

_that's when Mikan decided to take a better look at the guy. Just as she was looking closely they broke up their kiss. And the guy turned around. When Mikan saw who it was She was looking in disbelief while thinking " It can't be him he wouldn't do this to me. It must be Hotaru, She must be playing a trick on me, Or Maybe it's a camera trick, Natsume would NEVER hurt me, he said so himself " Mikan thought while convincing herself it wasn't true._

_Although a part of her knew it was true. She was just to stubborn to accept that Natsume cheated on her._

_" Mikan let me explain on how,when and where I videotaped him.  
>Well on that day that that happened,Well it was yesterday, Me and Ruka were in Central town, Strolling around, When we saw Natsume with a girl with blonde hair, that blonde haired girl fro the video to be precise. I checked her out and found out she was, Luna Koizumi, Age 15, Soul Entrapping Alice. Transfer student from Alice Academy : America." She explained<em>

_"When Me and Ruka saw them, we had our suspicions. Although ruka told me Natsume wasn't the type who would ever cheat on Mikan. But I told him we should still follow them just to make sure I told him, We then followed them to that park where they talked then started making out. I started to tape it for evidence._

_After there make out session, I confronted Hyuuga along with Ruka. We talked to him. But all he did was say bad things about you like: She's nothing but garbage. She was just a toy. Things like that! When I couldn't take it anymore I started hitting him with my baka gun. Though ruka told me to stop, And he said he'll try to talk to Natsume. But in the end they just had a Big fight and ruka is currently in the hospital because of Natsume and his fight._

_But I know one thing for certain is that He and Hyuuga aren't friends anymore." Hotaru said furiously while tears were coming out of her eyes. Mikan at this point was sobbing uncontrollably while still trying to calm down Hotaru._

_"I will Confront him Hotaru, I will" Mikan said determined while still crying  
>'Let's wash our face and go to the classroom before class starts Mikan." Hotaru said wiping her tear and Mikan just nodded.<em>

_After they cleaned themselves up and went inside the classroom, they found out they were late and got scolded by Narumi-sensei._

_When Mikan aprroached her seat she saw someone already sitting there, And it was that girl Luna. Mikan raised her hand" narumi sensei where will I sit?" mikan asked_

_"Sit at Ruka's seat at the mean time." Narumi said  
>"But Narumi sensei, I don't want to sit next to Natsume anymore." She said while trying to contain her anger and sadness. Gasps where heard all aroung. I mean Why does Mikan Sakura want to be away from her boyfriend?<em>

_"Why is that Mikan?" Narumi asked Mikan concerned._

_When narumi looked at natsume he had an stoic expression, Luna held a proud smirk on her face, As if she achieved something._

_Mikan then went to Narumi sensei and explained everything. He immediately understood and was transferred next to koko, Where Luna was __**SUPPOSEDLY **__to sit. Mikan only smiled at Koko and he looked at her with a shocked face, Cause it seems he read her mind. And when she sat down, He immediately hugged her._

_And that went on even until ruka came back, Even he changed seats, He axchanged seats with Permy, When he was asked by Narumi, He told the same story Mikan told and Immediately complied with Ruka's request.  
><em>

_And because of the exchange of seats people created rumors some which were true and some were just sick and wrong._

_Mikan when looked at her seemed to be slimmer and duller. Not the usual happy-go-lucky brunette they know and love. And that worried the people who knew her situation and they too hate the cause of her change, pain and despair. Natsume Hyuuga. The cold-hearted jerk who broke Mikan's heart_

_~End of Flashback~_

_Do you do what you did when you did with me  
>Does she love you the way I can<br>Did you Forget all the plans that you made with me  
>Cause Baby I didn't<em>

_~Flashback~_

_**MIKAN's POV**_

_I had so many questions, I wanted to ask him.  
>It was already 1 month since I found out about Luna, And it still hurt like hell.<br>I started eating less since maybe I would look more beautiful and maybe, Natsume will come back to me again._

_I wanted to know if I was special to him since when we were together I feel loved. He would smile for me when I was crying. Or maybe he is always like that when he is in a relationship, NO he has never been in a relationship. And I heard that people would always talk how sweet Natsume is to Luna. Did he treat us the same, The same treatment, Or did he get sweeter just for her? UGH!_

_Did he love me because she is better than me? Prettier than me? Smarter than me? Better kisser? WHY? WHY? WHY IS HE DOING THIS TO ME?_

_Did he forget ALL the promises we made to each other, All the plans we had after they get out of the academy. I know I haven't, Cause I know I will never. It hurts too bad._

_Maybe I should kill myself then he'll see my worth._

_I went to the bathtub I have in my bathroom. And hopped in, When I got in I slhashed the word " perfect" in my arm while singing friggin perfect by pink._

_After I did it I felt so light, All the pain I felt went away and I felt so happy I started to close my eyes and fell asleep,_

_When I woke up I saw White walls, Whilte ceiling, I was in white clothes.  
>"Am I in heaven?" I asked<em>

_Just then someone hugged me, When I turned to see who it was I saw it was Hotaru._

_" Hotaru? Am I in the hospital? Why did you save me ?" I asked crying. I then suddenly felt a stinging sensation in my left cheek, When I touched it, I realized that Hotaru slapped me._

_When I looked at Hotaru she was shaking vigorously while sobbing._

_"MIKAW HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?" Hotaru shouted at me  
>" WHY DO YOU ALWAYS MAKE US WORRY, WHY DID YOU DO IT?" She shouted tome once again.<em>

_"Hotaru…." I said_

_" Mikan I'm sorry, I shouldn't have shouted at you, I am sorry, It's just that I couldn't see you like this, It hurt me too much, I am so sorry." Hotaru said hugging me tightly while crying uncontrollably._

_"Hotaru, I just couldn't take the pain anymore, I just couldn't I am sorry, I thought that if I tried to kill myself, Natsume would come back to me, But I bet he didn't even visit." I said while blinking back the tears that were threatening to spill._

_"He didn't cause I didn't tell him, Since I didn't want him to some back into your life knowing it will still hurt you even if comes back to you." Hotaru said and I nodded._

_"I will try to be strong from now on, I won't be strong for just me. I will be strong for You, Ruka-pyon, Anna, Nonoko, Koko, yuu, Permy, Mochu, And for everyone else who loves and cares for me." I said_

_~End of flashback~_

_That should be me, holding your hand  
>That should be me making you laugh<br>That should be me this is so sad  
>That should be me<br>That Should be me feeling your kiss  
>That should be me buying you gifts<br>This is so wrong  
>I can't go on<br>Till you believe  
>That, That should be me<em>

_MiKAN's POV_

When I see them holding hands, I know that should be me, or was

Before I was the reason he smiled, he laughed, I was the one who made him happy, But I guess that was before, Or all the times he smiled and laughed was only an act to make me fall head over heels in love with him. For when he broke my heart he knew it would hurt.

I really do get sad when I think about it that everything that is happening to her should happen to me. 

That should be me, Feeling your kisses , your love, the passion,Your teases, Everything!  
>I should be the one who gives you gifts for Christmas, birthdays, Mothsaried, Anniversaries. Every Occasion. But it's her who get's the privilege<p>

Everything is so screwed up, upside down WRONG!

I won't give up on you, I'll keep loving you from a far, even though I know I'll only get hurt_  
><em>_**  
><strong>__End of PoV__**  
><strong>__  
>You said you needed a little time from my mistakes<br>It's funny how you use that time to have me replace  
>Do you think that I wouldn't see you out in the movies<br>What you doin' to me  
>Your taking her where we used to go<br>And if your trying to brake my heart  
>It's working cause you know<em>

_~FLASHBACK~_

_MIKAN POV_

_It was a week after I had fully recovered and got released out of the hospital, When I greeted everyone back at class they started running towards we and scolding me for what have I done but hugged me in the end. And said thank you that I was still alive._

_That day I decided to talk to Natsume._

_~Sakura Tree~_

_I looked and saw that Natsume was all alone and Luna was nowhere in sight._

_"Natsume, Can we talk?" I asked him seriously_

_"Hn. About what little girl?" He asked with a stoic expression_

_"Why? Why did you hurt me Natsume, I just want to know your explanation after that, I will never talk to you or bother you ever again." I told him_

_"I did it, because I got tired of you, Your attitude, All your mistakes, Everything about you annoyed me, So when Luna came, Her and I became closer and I grown a liking to her, that's that._

_"I see, So you found a replacement for me that fast?" I asked  
>He just nodded<em>

_"Oh I see. Thank you for your time, Hyuuga-kun." I said while walking away_

_~Central town: Movie house_

_I was on a girls bonding date with the girls obviously.  
>We watched a movie called Remember me<em>

_When we entered we sat on the second to the last row. And I sat. to my right was Hotaru, and to my left was…. Luna and when I looked to who she was with I saw Natsume._

_I told Hotaru that and we immediately switched rows._

_It was always like this. I hear that he takes her to ALL the places he's brought me to.  
>EVERYWHERE we went. We seem to end up seeing them.<em>

_Is he dilibirately trying to shatter, crush, hurt break my heart into pieces?  
>If he is then IT IS WORKING!<br>Cause it hurts TOO much and SO much  
>I'll just try to look away<br>But my eyes always stay._

_~End of flashback!~  
><em>  
>MIKAN's POV<p>

After the song ended, I realized how much I hurt myself and ended up hurting others too. Now I know that I should let go of Natsume who is Now happy with Luna. Cause I know that Even if I cry millions of gallons of tears, He still wouldn't come back to me. I should have realized that a long time ago. Now I know whe something is not ment to be it just isn't. And you should just let it go.

I just hope someone will come and open my locked up heart. And I hope that he would be the one to make me a whole. The missing piece to the puzzle. The other half of my heart.

Someday that Hope will come true. Someday…

So until we meet again Goodbye – Mikan Sakura

**Hey, so did you guys like it?  
>I will try to do more if you like?<strong>

**Read and Review Please.  
>Please read my other stories too. I will try to update soon my other stories. <strong>** Thank you to those who will read and or review my story :D**__


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